Last night I went to bed shortly after learning of the Grand Jury's decision to not indict the officer who killed Michael Brown. I was sad and outraged.
I'm not saying that the officer should necessarily be convicted (I'd need to see all the evidence to decide), but I can't understand how - in a case where an unarmed teenager was shot six times - there isn't enough evidence to at least charge the shooter and move forward to trial. At least, that's my understanding of what a Grand Jury is supposed to determine.
As I turned off my light for the night, I thought about Michael Brown's family - and my friends who weren't born with white skin.
About 45 minutes later, I was awakened by what sounded like screams coming from my alley. I bolted out of bed, grabbing my cell phone, thinking someone was being attacked and I'd need to call 911. Once I got my bearings, however, I realized I was hearing shouting, not screaming, and there were many voices, not one.
I pulled my shades and looked out to see waves of red and blue light, indicating police were already on the scene. Waking up a bit more, I realized that I was hearing a crowd of people protesting the Ferguson verdict. Because my windows don't face the street, I could only see the police lights and hear the chanting.
My mind raced - was it a peaceful protest or was it teetering on the edge of a riot? I stood at my window, listening, and finally deducing that the voices and lights were moving - presumably marching down 16th Street to the White House.
I sagged back into bed, contemplating my reaction. I'd instinctively grabbed my phone to call the police and had found some reassurance when I realized they were already involved with whatever was happening.
One the whole, police do far more good than bad. And they've voluntarily signed up to put themselves in the line of danger to protect and serve their communities. I appreciate their service. But I wonder how different my view would be if I hadn't been born with pale skin... if I were pulled over because my car looked "too nice" for me to own, if I had to worry that by wearing a hoodie I'd look "suspicious."
If that were the case, I can't say my first reaction in a potentially threatening situation would be to call the police. And that's the conversation I think we need to be having.
Rather simply looking for justice in the conviction of his shooter, wouldn't Michael Brown's life be better commemorated by opening a real dialogue about white privilege and racial profiling, so we can begin challenging the thinking that prompts officers to read threats where they don't exist - and that can prevent minorities from seeing police as their allies?
So let's keep this conversation going. But let's also remember that conversations aren't people. Michael Brown was a "gentle giant," a student and a son.
While he might not have gotten justice, I hope his legacy brings justice for others.
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